The Top Signs There Could be Trouble in the Obamas' Marriage
Posted by Chris Dillon on 1/14/2014 11:30:00 AM.

The tabloids are speculating that Barack and Michelle Obama's marriage is on the rocks. Could it be true? You might agree after hearing The Top Signs There Could be Trouble in the Obamas' Marriage.

1) He's been referring to her as the SECOND Lady.

2) When she fist-bumps him, she's actually aiming for his face.

3) Instead of a Secret Service detail, he gives her three retired mall cops.

4) She just spent her vacation with Oprah . . . so she now hates ALL men.

5) They've started attending separate services at the mosque.

6) Every morning she greets him with that I-Can't-Believe-You're-Taking-a-Selfie-at-Nelson Mandela's-Funeral frown.

7) Other than the fact he's an awful president, they can't find anything to agree on.

8) During sex, she admits to having fantasies . . . that the country is governed by a competent president.

9) He responded honestly when she asked if her new dress made her look big. And SHE responded honestly when he asked if Obamacare would ever be anything other than an unmitigated disaster.

10) Amazingly, it can get pretty annoying when a dude justifies his refusal to take out the trash by reminding everyone he killed Bin Laden.

11) She changed all the TVs in the White House to Fox News.

12) He is throwing her a surprise 50th birthday party . . . in Benghazi.

13) She took a vacation without Barack, even though Barack's favorite thing to do is to not work.

14) He just announced that his next government website will be something called "Obamadate."

15) Bill Clinton recently gave him an unusually enthusiastic high-five...

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